Remembering our Grandmother. Bessie (née Morton) Johnson 1908-1932

Today Marks the 93rd Anniversary of the death of our Grandmother, Bessie (née Morton) Rominger Turrentine Johnson

Bessie (1908 – June 17, 1932) was the daughter of Novele Morton Rominger (1896–1924) and Ed Rominger (1870–1945). She was one of six children and part of a generation shaped by both hardship and hope.

Her siblings were:

• Edna (1912–1999)

• Fred (1914–1987)

• Mary Jane (1916–1993)

• Clinton (1920–1973)

• A sibling who died in childbirth in 1922

• Dora (1924–1950)

Bessie married Roosevelt Turrentine on March 27, 1929, in Halifax, Virginia, and they had one daughter, Lucille “Lucy” (1927–2004). She later married Troy Johnson on June 19, 1930, in Danville, Virginia, and they had one daughter, Ella Louise Thompson (née Johnson, 1928–2003).

Ella was just five years old when Bessie passed away in 1932. Losing her mother at such a young age left a lasting wound that she carried throughout her life. The absence of Bessie’s presence—her guidance, protection, and love—was deeply felt and often reflected in the way Ella spoke of her mother’s memory. Even without many stories passed down, the grief that followed Bessie’s passing speaks volumes about the love and importance she held in her family’s heart.

Bessie’s legacy continues through her grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and great-great-grandchildren, who carry forward the memory of her life and lineage.

Honoring Those Who Came Before Us: A Simple Reflection on Ancestral Veneration - Ms. Otelia's Corner

In many cultures, ancestral veneration is not about worship — it’s about respect, remembrance, and relationship. It’s the quiet understanding that we didn’t get here on our own. We carry the prayers, the pain, and the perseverance of those who came before us — whether we know their names or not.

For some, honoring ancestors means lighting a candle or placing a photo on an altar. For others, it’s cooking a family recipe, saying a name out loud, or simply taking a moment to give thanks. There’s no one way to do it, and that’s the beauty of it — ancestral veneration is personal, powerful, and rooted in presence.

Here’s the truth:

• You don’t need expensive tools.

• You don’t need to know your whole family tree.

• You don’t even need to have the “right” words.

All you need is intention.

A whispered thank you in the morning.
A cup of coffee poured in someone’s memory.
A photo dusted and displayed with care.

These are acts of connection — reminders that life doesn’t begin and end with us. We are links in a long, unbroken chain.

For me, ancestral veneration is about grounding.

Grounding is the practice of reconnecting yourself to the present moment — mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. When life feels chaotic or uncertain, grounding helps bring you back to center. And remembering your ancestors — their strength, their survival, their sacrifices — can be a powerful way to do that.

When I pause to honor them, I remember that I’m not standing on shaky ground. I’m standing on stories, on prayers, on strength that was passed down. Whether I light a candle or just speak their name, it reminds me: I’m not alone. I come from something. I am something.

That’s what ancestral veneration does.
It brings peace in the present.
It gives meaning to the past.
And it plants strength for the future.

When The Chaos of Life Meets the Consistency of God - Ms. Otelia's Corner

Life doesn’t always wait for us to catch up. It rushes in — unannounced and unfiltered — bringing both joy and hardship in the same breath. One moment you’re laughing, the next you’re overwhelmed. Plans fall through. People disappoint. Sickness knocks. Grief lingers. And just when you think you’ve made it through one thing, here comes something else. Life keeps lifeing.

But even in all that mess — God keeps Goding.

That may not be proper grammar, but it’s the realest truth I know.

Because while life shifts, God stays.
While life confuses, God clarifies.
While life drains, God restores.

I’ve had days where I questioned everything — where the weight felt too heavy and the answers were too few. But somewhere in the silence, God reminded me He hadn’t moved. His presence isn’t based on how well life is going. He is still God in the storm, in the waiting room, in the unpaid bill, in the heartbreak, in the healing, in the comeback.

God’s consistency shows up in ways we don’t always expect:

• A timely phone call

• A Scripture that hits different

• A stranger’s kindness

• Peace that makes no sense

We may not always feel Him, but He’s still there — still faithful, still good, still holding it all together when we feel like we’re falling apart.

So if life is chaos right now, don’t lose heart.
You’re not walking through it alone.
The world may be shifting, but the God who holds the world isn’t.

He was God yesterday.
He’s still God today.
And He will be God tomorrow.

The Power of Me: Embracing Self-Growth - Ms. Otelia's Corner

External influences often minimize our inner voice; so understanding and cultivating our power is important. Let's talk about the insights and practical steps to help us tap into our unique strengths and capabilities.

Self-empowerment is about recognizing our inherent worth and capabilities. It's the process of taking control of our lives, setting goals, and making choices that align with our true selves. To embark on this empowering journey let's start by reflecting on our values, beliefs, and the things that truly matter to us.

Personal growth is a constant journey that involves expanding our understanding of ourselves and the world around us. We must embrace learning, be open to new experiences, and be willing to step out of our comfort zone. Remember, our growth often happens outside the familiar boundaries of our comfort zone

At the heart of personal empowerment is self-awareness. It's about understanding our emotions, strengths, weaknesses, and triggers. Practices like mindfulness, journaling, and introspection can significantly enhance our self-awareness and lead us to more conscious decision-making.

Your individuality is your SUPERPOWER.

We must embrace what makes us unique, whether it's our perspective, talents, or life experiences. Celebrating our uniqueness isn't just about self-acceptance; it's about contributing our one-of-a-kind qualities to the world.

The path to self-empowerment is often lined with challenges. These obstacles, whether they are internal like self-doubt, or external like societal pressures, are not roadblocks but growth opportunities. Face them with resilience and remember that every challenge is a chance to learn and become stronger.

Optional Steps to Unlocking 'The Power of Me'

1. Set Personal Goals: Define what success and happiness mean to you and set goals accordingly.
2. Cultivate Positive Habits: Build habits that align with your goals and values.
3. Seek Knowledge and Inspiration: Read books, listen to podcasts, and surround yourself with people who inspire you.
4. Practice Self-Care: Prioritize your physical, mental, and emotional well-being.
5. Reflect Regularly: Take time to reflect on your journey, celebrate your wins, and learn from your setbacks.

The journey to discovering "The Power of Me" is unique and deeply personal. It's about finding our voice, understanding our worth, and stepping into our power. I hope this guide inspires you to start or continue your journey of self-empowerment.

I'd love to hear about your journey and experiences. Share your stories in the comments below.

Understanding Grace: Overcoming Barriers to Kindness | Ms. Otelia's Corner

What is Grace?
Before diving into the complexities of human interactions and the difficulties people face in extending grace to one another, let's first define what grace actually is. Grace is the act of showing kindness, compassion, and understanding toward others, especially when they make mistakes or fall short of expectations. It is the willingness to forgive and not hold grudges, to give people the benefit of the doubt, and to show mercy rather than judgment. In essence, grace is the lubricant that eases the friction of human relationships, allowing us to live and work together in harmony.

The Importance of Grace
Grace is not just a lofty ideal; it's a practical necessity for any functioning society. It allows us to navigate the complexities of human relationships, to forgive and move on, and to create a more empathetic and understanding community. Grace is what enables friendships to last, marriages to endure, and societies to thrive. Without it, every mistake would be a dead-end, and every offense a relationship-ender.

The Barriers to Grace
So, if grace is so important, why is it often so hard for us to extend it to others? Here are some reasons:
 
Ego and Pride
One of the biggest barriers to giving grace is ego. People like to think of themselves as right, just, and fair. Admitting that someone else might also have a valid point, or forgiving them for a mistake, can feel like a blow to the ego.
 
Fear of Being Taken Advantage Of
Many people hesitate to show grace because they fear it will make them vulnerable to exploitation. The thought is that if you give an inch, people will take a mile.

Cultural and Social Conditioning
In many societies, people are conditioned to be competitive rather than cooperative. From a young age, most are taught to win, to be the best, and that showing weakness (like forgiving someone or admitting fault) is a bad thing.

Lack of Empathy
Sometimes, it's a simple lack of empathy that prevents people from showing grace. If they can't put themselves in another person's shoes and see the world from that person's perspective, it's unlikely they will be willing to extend grace to them.
 
The Path Forward
Giving grace is not about being naive or letting people walk all over you. It's about recognizing that everyone is human, all are flawed, and all deserving of understanding and compassion. It's about creating a space where people can make mistakes and learn from them, rather than be condemned for them.
 
To cultivate grace, we need to start with ourselves. We need to recognize our own imperfections and extend grace to ourselves first. Only then can we truly understand the value of giving it to others.

So the next time you find it hard to extend grace, take a moment to reflect on why that is. Is it your ego, fear, or lack of empathy that's holding you back? By identifying these barriers and actively working to overcome them, we can all make the world a more gracious place.

By understanding the barriers that make it difficult for us to extend grace, we can work on breaking them down, both within ourselves and in our communities.  After all, a world with more grace is a world with more love, understanding, and harmony—and who wouldn't want to live in a world like that?"

Resources: Some Steps to Extending Grace: A Practical Guide - Ms. Otelia's Corner

Conquering Procrastination: Effective Tactics for Enhanced Productivity - Ms. Otelia's Corner

Do you ever find yourself putting off tasks for later? I'm a big procrastinator myself. I'll move projects around, do something small, then move them again. Does this sound like you? Starting important things can be hard. But don't worry, we're in this together. Many of us struggle with this thing called procrastination. But guess what? We can figure out why we do it and learn some tricks to beat it.

Why Do We Procrastinate?

Procrastination is when we put off tasks that we should be working on right now. It's like our brain's way of saying, "I'll do it later." There are reasons behind this behavior:

• Instant Gratification: Our brains love rewards that come quickly. Procrastination often happens because we choose short-term pleasure (like watching a funny video) over long-term gain (finishing a project)
• Fear of Failure: Sometimes, we're afraid that we won't do a good job. So, we delay starting the task to avoid the possibility of failing.
• Lack of Motivation: When a task feels overwhelming or uninteresting, we tend to put it off in favor of something more fun.

Strategies to Beat Procrastination:

1. Two-Minute Rule: If a task takes less than two minutes to complete, do it right away. This could be replying to a quick email or tidying up your workspace. This helps clear away small tasks that can pile up.

2. Set Specific Deadlines: Instead of saying "I'll do it someday," set clear deadlines for yourself. Make them realistic and achievable. Deadlines create a sense of urgency and can push you to start sooner. 

3. Visualize Task Completion: Imagine how good it will feel when you finish a task. Close your eyes and picture the sense of accomplishment. This can motivate you to get started. 

4. Break It Down: Large tasks can feel overwhelming, leading to procrastination. Break them into smaller, manageable steps. This makes the task seem less daunting and easier to start. 

5. Use the Pomodoro Technique: Set a timer for 25 minutes and work on a task with full focus. When the timer rings, take a 5-minute break. This method, developed by Francesco Cirillo, is excellent for maintaining concentration and preventing burnout. It's especially effective for larger tasks that require sustained effort. 

6. Implement the Eisenhower Method: This technique involves categorizing tasks based on their urgency and importance. Create a matrix with four quadrants: urgent and important, important but not urgent, urgent but not important, and neither urgent nor important. This helps in prioritizing tasks effectively and ensures that you're focusing on what truly matters. 

7. Reward Yourself: Promise yourself a reward after completing a task. It could be something you enjoy, like watching an episode of your favorite show or having a piece of chocolate.  

8. Find an Accountability Partner: Share your goals with a friend or family member who can help keep you on track. Checking in with someone can give you that extra nudge to start working. 

Remember, You Can Beat Procrastination:

Overcoming procrastination takes time and effort. Start by understanding why you procrastinate. Is it the fear of failing, the lack of motivation, or something else? Then, try different strategies to see what works best for you. Remember, you're not alone in this struggle, and with determination and practice, you can develop healthier habits and conquer procrastination.

So, the next time you catch yourself saying "I'll do it later," take a deep breath and remind yourself of the strategies you've learned. With each small step you take, you're one step closer to becoming a more productive and focused individual. You've got this!

Eisenhower Matrix: Prioritize with Precision

 The Eisenhower Matrix, also known as the Eisenhower Decision Matrix, is a powerful time management technique that helps you prioritize tasks effectively. This method was popularized by Dwight D. Eisenhower, the 34th President of the United States and a former General of the Army. Eisenhower's exceptional ability to manage his time and tasks led to the development of this matrix, which has since become a widely used approach to task prioritization.

The matrix categorizes tasks into four distinct quadrants based on their urgency and importance:

1. Urgent and Important: Tasks that fall into this quadrant demand immediate attention and contribute significantly to your goals. These tasks require your immediate action and should be addressed promptly.

1. Important but Not Urgent: In this quadrant, you find tasks that are crucial for your long-term objectives but don't require immediate attention. Allocate dedicated time to work on these tasks and plan ahead to ensure their completion.

1. Urgent but Not Important: Tasks here are often distractions or interruptions that demand your immediate response but don't contribute significantly to your goals. Delegation or minimization of these tasks can free up valuable time for more important matters.

1. Not Urgent and Not Important: The tasks in this quadrant are of low priority and have minimal impact on your goals. Consider eliminating or deferring these tasks to create more space for higher-priority activities.

By employing the Eisenhower Matrix, you can make informed decisions about how to manage your time and tasks, ensuring that you focus on what truly matters. This method empowers you to avoid the trap of reacting to urgent but less important tasks, allowing you to align your efforts with your most significant objectives.
Reference: The Eisenhower Matrix was popularized by Dwight D. Eisenhower, former President of the United States and Army General.

Mastering Productivity with the Pomodoro Technique: A Simple Step-by-Step Guide

 Are you tired of getting distracted while trying to work or study? The Pomodoro Technique might just be your new secret weapon for staying focused and getting things done. In this guide, I'll walk you through the Pomodoro Technique step by step, making it super easy for you to start using it right away.

Step 1: Gather Your Supplies

All you need is a timer (you can use your phone or a kitchen timer) and your work or study materials. Oh, and a bit of enthusiasm, of course!

Step 2: Choose Your Task

Pick a task you want to work on. It could be reading, writing, coding, or whatever you need to get done.

Step 3: Set Your Timer for 25 Minutes

This is your Pomodoro, which is Italian for "tomato." It's named after those kitchen timers that look like tomatoes. You're going to work on your chosen task for 25 minutes straight.

Step 4: Work, Work, Work!

Start working on your task and give it your full attention. No checking your phone, no scrolling through social media – just focus on what you're doing.

Step 5: Ding! Take a Short Break

When the timer rings after 25 minutes, stop working. You've completed one Pomodoro! Now, take a 5-minute break. Stretch, grab a snack, or do a quick dance – whatever makes you happy.

Step 6: Repeat and Rest

Go back to your task for another 25 minutes of focused work. Keep repeating steps 4 and 5: work for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break.

Step 7: After Four Pomodoros, Take a Longer Break

After completing four Pomodoros (that's about 2 hours), take a longer break – around 15 to 30 minutes. It's like your reward for being super productive!

Extra Tips for Pomodoro Success:

• Choose Realistic Tasks: Make sure your tasks fit within a 25-minute time frame. If a task is too big, break it into smaller parts.
• Use a Timer: The timer is your trusty companion. It keeps you on track and prevents you from working endlessly.
• Stay Consistent: Practice the Pomodoro Technique regularly to build your focus muscles. The more you do it, the easier it becomes.
• Adjust as Needed: If you find that 25 minutes is too long or short, feel free to adjust the time to fit your needs.
• Stay Mindful: During your Pomodoros, be mindful of distractions. If something pops into your head, jot it down and get back to work.

Why the Pomodoro Technique Works:

Breaking your work into manageable chunks keeps you from feeling overwhelmed. The short breaks refresh your mind and prevent burnout. Plus, knowing that a break is coming up can motivate you to power through your tasks.

So, there you have it – the Pomodoro Technique in a nutshell! Give it a try and see how it transforms your productivity. Remember, it's not about working harder, but about working smarter. Happy Pomodoro-ing! 🍅🕒

Reference

The Pomodoro Technique, a time management method that involves breaking work into focused intervals, was developed by Francesco Cirillo in the late 1980s (Cirillo, 1989).

"When Life is Lifin': Here's What I Do - Ms. Otelia's Corner"

Life has a way of throwing unexpected curveballs our way. Just when we think we've got it all figured out, it decides to go full-on "lifin'" mode, subjecting us to a whirlwind of uncertainty, challenges, and rapid changes. But here's the thing: I've learned that instead of letting it bring me down, I can rise above the chaos. In this blog post, I want to share my personal strategies and mindset shifts for navigating the storm when life is lifin'.

1. Embrace the Unpredictability: When life throws unexpected twists and turns, I've learned to embrace the unpredictability that comes with it. Rather than resisting or dwelling on what could have been, let's embrace the idea that life's surprises can lead to unforeseen opportunities and personal growth. Embracing the unknown allows us to build inner strength and find the courage in adjusting to new circumstances.
2. Prioritize Taking Care of Yourself: During challenging times, taking care of ourselves becomes even more crucial. Let's make self-care a top priority by engaging in activities that nourish our mind, body, and soul. Whether it's pursuing a favorite hobby my favorite things are sewing, machine embroidery, or reading a good book, let's focus on activities that bring us joy and help us recharge. Remember, self-care is not selfish; it's a way to replenish our energy and better cope with life's demands.
3. Seek Support: When life is lifin', don't hesitate to seek support. We don't have to face it all alone. Lean on loved ones, friends, or even seek professional help if needed. Sharing our experiences, gaining different perspectives, and receiving emotional support from those who uplift and care for us can make a world of difference. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness but rather a sign of strength and a willingness to grow.
4. Embrace Flexibility and Openness: Being flexible and open-minded is our secret weapon when life takes unexpected turns. Promoting a mindset that embraces change allows us to adjust our plans and expectations. Let's be open to different approaches, explore new possibilities, and tackle challenges with a problem-solving mindset. Embracing flexibility enables us to navigate obstacles with grace and resilience.
5. Focus on What We Can Control: In times of chaos, let's remind ourselves to focus on the things we can directly influence. Instead of getting caught up in things beyond our reach, let's identify the aspects of our lives that we have the power to change or improve. By taking proactive steps toward those areas, we regain a sense of control and empower ourselves to make positive changes. It's liberating to let go of what we can't control and concentrate on what we can actively shape.
6. Practice Mindfulness: Being present and aware grounds us in the moment, even when life feels overwhelming. Engage in simple mindfulness practices like deep breathing, meditation, or writing in a journal to quiet the mind and find inner calm. Mindfulness allows us to detach from future worries or past regrets and fosters a greater acceptance of the present moment. It's a powerful tool for finding balance amidst the chaos.

When life is lifin', remember that within chaos lies the potential for growth, resilience, and new opportunities. By embracing unpredictability, prioritizing self-care, seeking support, embracing flexibility and openness, focusing on what we can control, and practicing mindfulness, we can navigate life's storms with determination and emerge stronger on the other side. So, if life is throwing you a curveball right now, remember that you have the inner strength to rise above it. Embrace the journey and tap into your true potential.

Disclaimer:  The strategies and mindset shifts shared in this article are based on personal experiences and perspectives. However, it's important to remember that everyone's journey is unique. Adapt these strategies to your own circumstances and consult professionals as needed. The information provided is for general informational purposes only and should not be